We all aspire to something – it might be aiming big like becoming the next president of the United States, or small like getting enough food to feed your family. We all have different motives in our day-to-day lives, we all have a different perception of life. Some would rather plan ahead while others would choose the Carpe Diem way of living. Would you rather go with the flow, or plan one or two months in advance? You either think too much or not enough about the future.
Wherever you might be in your life, high school, university, the working world, you still need to figure out what you need or want from your life. Isn’t it scary that I don’t know what my plans for the next few years are? How am I expected to know what job I want to do later if I don’t even know what my plans for tonight are? After three years at university, I’m still trying to decide where I’ll be next year, and I’ve got no fucking clue. The thing is, when you’ve settled for some time you don’t have to think about what’s next, you just create a routine, a comfort zone until the end is near, and you can’t help but think what to do next.
Dreams. Isn’t it what life is all about? Dreaming of what our lives could be like? Still, the older and closer you get to working, the more your dreams become less and less extrapolate, the more real everything you imagined back when you were 15 becomes concrete or far from what you dreamed of. Did you image you would have your life sorted out? Well, it’s not really happening. When people ask me what I want to do after, I just answer the most logical reply I can come up with, which is doing a master. But is it just a way of buying myself some time to find what I really want to do later? I guess dreaming of your life is just a great motivation to keep going forward, to push yourself to do the best you can to achieve those goals. Even though most of the time, things don’t go as planned.
Fears. The unknown is scary. You don’t know what could happen tomorrow or in the next couple of days. I can understand the carpe diem perception of life, you just enjoy every moment as if it was your last. But what about tomorrow’s consequences? I would be lying if I said I’m not afraid of what’s coming. I’m afraid of disappointing my parents who put so much hope in me to succeed and be happy in whatever I’ll be doing. Still, society puts so many expectations. You need a degree to get a job. You need a job to have wealth. You can’t be happy without money. Fears can stop you from doing the things you want to be doing. Fear of being alone, fear of losing everything you have earned, still if you never take the risk you won’t know for sure if it was worth it. Before taking off to Brazil for four months, I almost declined the offer of an internship because I was afraid of losing my friends if I was never back home, I was afraid of what life would be like there, I was afraid I wouldn’t be strong enough to endure the distance. Yet, I survived. And it was one of the most amazing experiences I could’ve ever lived.
Reality. Life is tougher than you expect. It isn’t all flowers and unicorns, nothing comes easy. You can’t just expect to attend events, network with important people, get offered trips to Bali for free just to brag about how incredible life is there on your trendy blog (yes Francesca that’s pretty much your plan I know). I’ve learned not to give anything for granted, and to work for what I want, whatever that is. It’s fine to get high hopes if you have some good foundations on which you can rely on in case you fall, that’s why I would strongly advise you to always have a backup plan, whatever you are aiming at.
Objectives. Without motivation you can’t get anywhere in your life, professionally or personally. Dreaming too big? Fair enough as long as you give yourself a shot at succeeding. I never was the sportive type of girl, until someone close to me suggested that I could use some running to feel better about myself. More than two years later, I’ve run two half-marathons and I have never thought I would call myself a runner. Challenging yourself, in whichever field, is a good way to start your journey. Building oneself should not be a process relying on others but on oneself. Nobody except yourself will know what you really like, what will satisfy you. Setting goals is just a way of keeping motivated enough to accomplish something you’ll be proud of.
All you need sometimes is a little push. If you are unhappy with your routine, give yourself an objective to reach – in your job or in your personal life, it might be a new hobby or a different sport, a new place to live in or whatever is that you fancy doing. Change is needed from time to time, just do remind yourself that if you’re facing a wall you can just look the other way and find a fence in the bricks. Listen to the people around you.
If you don’t find answers on your own, get inspired somewhere else.